a l y n a p p i e s . c o m

stupid expectations. stupid other ppl’s expectations of me. stupid excuse for putting the blame on me when other ppl break things that don’t belong to them. bahhhhh.

headache. vomit blood only.

hate hate hate.

bahhhhh.

>B”[

I will not compromise my beliefs and principals.

does that make me too honest and cruel?

I just think I shouldn’t waste my time being someone I’m obviously not just to please the general public.

I am me.

deal with it.

when you think things just might get a little better… don’t bother.

everythings so bloody frustrating.

like it couldn’t get any worse than it already is.

the last year didn’t feel like it brought much improvement to my life. same ol job. put on weight. hardly had any time really to do what i wanted to do. scoldings. favoritism. everything i did was not good enough. useless. no bonus. plenty of late nights at work but no overtime. pants don’t fit. nothing fits. still can’t afford to own my own place. haven’t been on a real holiday(involving airtickets, tours… singaporef1 doesn’t count since it was crazy crossing the border like i lived in jb and worked in sg) since… i don’t know when. wisdom tooth extraction overdued. ppl looking at me up and down. ppl with their stupid standards. feeling like i’m not good enough. friend’s doing better than me. privacy invasion. judgmental parents. hair loss. neckache. sleep shortage. silent road rage. fear. tears. voids. don’t give a shit’s. the list goes on…

and thanks for telling me i’m fat. AGAIN.

here’s to another night of gastric attack and gaping sanity.

just great.

i so don’t want to work through the year end holiday when everyone else around me is nicely clearing their annual leave. and the worst part of it all is that i don’t even get overtime. so why am i still working at a company that underpays, overworks and does not appreciate my opinion?

there are so many things that i need to do for myself. but honestly, i lack determination and follow through. i think somehow, the state of things i’m in has become strangely comfortable. and it’s starting to worry me. alot.

i need intervention.

i need to rethink and try to focus.

sigh… easier said than done.

and where the heck did all my previous photos go?

geez….

made this today! anyone wanna buy this for 50 bucks? no.. the phone and cards are not included :P

Current Lacking:-
Sleep

i’m stupid.
i’m useless.
i’m disrespectful.
i’m lazy.
i’m naive.
i’m an unfilial daughter.

yes. apparently.

i really, really hate where i am now.

i know everyone’s kinda wound up about the gawddang petrol hike. but seriously, that’s nothing compared to what it did to ppl on the road. everyone turned into an idiot behind the wheel. and not to mention the two jackasses who scratched their way into lola just to get ahead. >X”[

hate.

!

i really can’t understand. the spite. the self righteousness. the insensitivity. the indifference. the pompousness. it’s downright fish mongering. is that what you call love? it’s soooo beyond what i can digest.

:(

anyway. yesterday the olympic torch passed through kl. tried to take some photos and videos of it from work but most of em turned out quite small and blur.anyhoo… i think the only part about it that i liked was how it made my journey out of the city pleasantly jam free. hurhur. but seriously la, it’s been 44 years since. we’re allowed to be a little jakun i’m sure. @_@

i really don’t know whats wrong with ppl nowadays. where did common decency go? where did chivalry go? honestly. it just makes me boil! fucking scrape Lola’s bumper and not even leave me a note to say sorry? i was in my parking box. i did not exceed my parking spot. in fact, i parked so much closer to the pillar, so that fuckers like you would have more room to maneuver. and this isn’t the first time. one dent on door, and another scrape near my petrol cap. fark all you idiots and wenches!

and i’m so sick of sean kingston’s beautiful girl song. why is it okay to sing a song about being suicidal? and don’t get me started on daughtry, carrie underwood and U2. and for the love of god… please stop going on and on about the brollie song. i. hate. it!!!!

i’ve got such a long list of things i hate. so much so that i’ve already got a hate list going on in my work journal and i don’t think it’s very pretty. i think one of these days, i want to list out properly what i hate and weigh it against what i like.

i think i might just have high blood one day. soon. maybe.

and i don’t like it. not even one bit of it.